Tired and overwhelmed....Do not read this blog if you don't want to get depressed it is the rantings that I just had to get out.

It's April which means that everything is hitting me full bore. I have 1.5 weeks until finals and I have to get students in before they leave so I'm in a bit of a crunch. Added to that this year I seem to have a lot more big events on campus to help students plan for, a new database that I need to start using by May 15th, campus-wide presentations, and my own graduation stuff. We had to pick out the weeks that we are taking furlough days, and reduced contract time and I just seem to feel like I'm not getting much support right now. I'm tired and drained. Last spring semester was hard, but this semester I just feel stretched really thin and my optimism seems to have taken leave of me. I don't mean to complain at all. I still think I'm making a difference, and think that on occasion I probably do go work, but I am ready for this semester to end.

We had a conversation about balance in my group supervision meeting last friday and I had to say I have no balance and I feel like I'm not allowed to have balance with my job. (which was funny since my boss was running the meeting) The duties of the job and the culture of the office/my particular job lead me to feel as if I have to take on more, get it done immediately, and not take any time to process the crisises that go on with students or within my own life. I feel like I can't even take a day off to be sick or something will drop and I'll get slammed for it. I know I usually feel this way in spring, and I'll get over it soon enough. Maybe it was the fact that it snowed up until last week and I need some sun and warmth and a haircut.